Thursday, March 09, 2006

The Worst Kindof Girl

I consider my self to be somewhat level headed with normal spaz out moments, but lately I feel like one big weirded out spaz freak in the most girlie sortof way. Things are getting better a little bit at a time with Mr. Man, but I'm still acting like an idiot. I sway form one extreme to the other. One minute I think he's fantastic and the next I want to kick him really really hard. Worst of all I deny my eloquence and become a rambling, stumbling, foot in mouth oaf when ever I'm around him or talk about him. I read way to many things into our almost nonexistent conversations. I get way too emotional too. I'm uber sensitive to everything he does and says and also what his family says. Everything is blown way out of proportion and I'm not thinking clearly and I've become an idiot girl pining for an idiot boy. I'm smarter than this. I know better. Stupid boys shouldn't have this much effect on me. Grr. I feel like I've become the worst kind of girl, but at least I've recognized the disease and have time to stop it. I don't want to be totally lost into air head world. I swear I have more substance than that even if I'm not currently acting like I do. I'm just glad he's still talking to me despite my crazy girlieness. He actually tolerates me quite well considering my temporary loss of sanity. I suppose its because he's temporally insane too.

Miss M

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