Mr. Man is bugging me. Ever since tha dance he's been looking at me and talking to me differently. Even other people are starting to notice that he's flirting a bit with me. It's driving me insane. It's terrifying me. I know that I still care about him a great deal but I don't want to be hurt again. We were over at a friend's house and when he was leaving he asked to hug me. Told me to come over to him and he hugged me and not just the quick pat sort of hug but a real one where our bodies mostly touched. Oh he he felt so nice and smelled so good and he smiled at me so big.
I feel sick to my stomach.
This makes me so nervous. I don't like to be confused. I like to know where I stand with people especially with Mr. Man. Our relationship always seems so precarious. I'm afraid that if I push too hard to understand whats happening that he'll run again. And as much as his flirting terrifies me I don't want him to run again. I want him to stay. I am just so frustrated though. I have a tedency to read too much into things so I've been trying to be really careful to stay in reality, but now that others have mentioned it to me my heart seems to want dare to dream. I want to kick him for confusing me but if this is real if he means what hes doing I could almost kiss him. I didn't get to last time. I sortof chickened out. But If we had another chance I'd kick him then I'd kiss him. :)
Miss M
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